Sugar Daddy

I've been staying in my house for 10 years.  Since I've lived there, I've had so many wonderful plans for the house.
My parents helped me tile the kitchen soon after I'd moved in (I leaned against the tiled wall and 3 tiles went crashing down behind me).  Another few knocks on another wall and about 20 tiles fell down (some attached to each other by grout, but not to the wall!!).  They had a few tile left over from their tiling job, so bought a few extra boxes and sorted out the kitchen,.

Over the past few years my house is showing signs of wear and tear.  I have an old house - you know the type with pressed ceilings and wooden floors (with "crawling space" beneath the flooring).  With the help of my parents, we have so far repaired an entire collapsed floor (mostly my dad's handiwork), and fixed a  few of the other collapsing floor (due to damp and termites).

The current job is painting and kitting out my daughter's bedroom.  There's so much to do... It's not just a quick paint the room - it's scrape down the walls, then damp-proof the walls, then paint...

My parents, again, have been instrumental in the process and even though they're retired... helping out where they can.  I can't expect them to continue helping, but I know as long as they are able, they will.  Whether it's a can of paint, or time spent.

I said to mom the other day after a long day of scraping, painting, filling, cleaning... "I should just meet a man, who doesn't want to live with me - he wants his house and I want mine... But he's got lots of money and wants my house to be beautiful so he'll pay to fix it up... "
My mom replied "He doesn't exist"  Then turns to my dad and tells him I'm looking for an old geyser with one foot in the grave and lots of money.  A sugar daddy who'll leave his fortune to me. My reply... "well if he's got one foot in the grave, I'm assuming he's much older than you.... what would you actually do if I introduced you to this man who's older than you?!"
My dad's response killed me.  "Hi. So what do we call you?... Dad?"

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